Is your loved one having difficulty in processing their own death?
I recently watched the movie The Seventh Seal. In it the main character, Crusader Antonius Block, is on a beach and approached by the...
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Distant Light Death Doula Services
A life well-lived and a death well-planned.
Janet Clattenburg
Death Doula
janetgoncalves
Oct 14, 20234 min
When death was a common thing to witness over 100 years ago, it was thus somewhat normalized.
A lot has changed in the past 150 years including our funeral traditions, and the way we die. Life 150 years ago was a lot more...
13 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Oct 7, 20233 min
No, you are not now the little man/woman of the house
“You have to be strong for your mom or dad” and “You are the little man/woman of the house now” are often phrases told by well-meaning...
9 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Oct 1, 20234 min
For Whom the Bell Tolls
There are many death rituals that are observed at a burial service or a funeral, that have their origins steeped in history. The ringing...
7 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Sep 23, 20233 min
Why it is so important to experience the pain of grief.
Grieving is hard work. It takes a lot of physical and mental energy. I bet no one has ever told you that before, but I will. Author,...
8 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Sep 17, 20233 min
Sitting with Your Grief
As I am writing this blog, Hurricane Lee is swirling around in the area that I live. The wind is blowing the leaves and branches off my...
2 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Sep 9, 20234 min
Learning to say goodbye when a parent dies.
Grief is the internal experience of a loss. Mourning is the outward expression. Together they equal bereavement. Bereavement comes from...
8 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Sep 3, 20233 min
Grieving is hard work especially when we are trying to live without the person who died
Grieving is hard work. It takes a lot of physical and mental energy. I bet no one has ever told you that before, but I will. Author,...
6 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Aug 27, 20233 min
"Monkey see, monkey do" does not apply when dealing with your own grief around children.
“Monkey see, monkey do” is a well know catchphrase. When hiding your feelings of grief around children, it is not the catchphrase to be...
14 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Aug 20, 20232 min
I want to do something death-related as a career but what are my options?
Some universities offer courses on Death. I’ve been fortunate to be a guest speaker at a local university in Halifax, Nova Scotia, for...
20 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Aug 13, 20233 min
Hiding Emotions
At work, I bought a mood ring the other day on a whim, as I was feeling nostalgic having had one when I was a little girl. It came with a...
5 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Aug 6, 20231 min
Conversations with mourners- things to avoid.
We all want to be there for someone when they are in their darkest hour, but it is important not to make things worse. These are the...
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janetgoncalves
Jul 30, 20232 min
Conversations with mourners- how to help
When we first hear that someone has suffered a loss, we often try to reach out to them, in person, via text, phone call or email. We...
2 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Jul 23, 20232 min
Grief is patient, but can't be avoided
The Meriam webster dictionary defines the term “avoidance” as a: an action of emptying, vacating, or clearing away, b: outlet, c: an act...
10 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Jul 16, 20233 min
Busting the myth about "you have to be strong" after a death
The idea of “being strong” after a death is so distorted to the point that it now implies that you should not have or demonstrate...
8 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Jul 9, 20234 min
"Ashes to ashes dust to dust" death ritual
If you have ever attended a burial in the United States, Canada, or Europe, you may have seen a specific death ritual in action- throwing...
1 view0 comments
janetgoncalves
Jul 2, 20232 min
Anticipatory Grief is real
Most people think that grief only occurs after the loss of someone, but that isn’t true. Grief can also occur before a loss, and it is...
10 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Jun 25, 20233 min
Summer solstice
June 21, 2023, is the date of the summer solstice here in Nova Scotia and officially marks the start of the new season. It is the longest...
5 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Jun 22, 20234 min
If you want peace- go to a graveyard, locally or abroad.
I’ve posted blogs mentioning my love of visiting graveyards locally and when travelling. I’m proud to be a taphophile. We are often...
7 views0 comments
janetgoncalves
Jun 11, 20232 min
Grief and Anxiety
Grief and anxiety can be considered as two sides of one coin. There is a strong relationship between these two. Anxiety is known to be a...
2 views0 comments
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